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Sunday, October 14, 2018

Divorce And Grief Counseling Kansas City; Therapist Expounds On The Stages Of Grief After Divorce

By Sharon Long


Divorce leaves one grieving of ambiguous loss. This brings about an intense feeling of grief, similar to what one feels after the death of a loved one. Regardless of the turn of events that lead to the end of your marriage, the parties involved are bound to experience loss in a very exceptional way. You can expect to grieve during divorce and even after your marriage is dissolved. If you require divorce and grief counseling Kansas City has a reliable number of proficient counselors to offer.

The first stage is often denial. This is when you are in disbelief of what is happening and you may even shut out all feelings of being hurt. The truth is that even those who clearly see their marriage coming to an end will still go through the denial stage. How long it lasts may highly depend on whether you saw the end of your marriage coming or not.

After denial comes the pain and fear stage. It is common for couples to feel hurt in more than a few distinct ways. For instance, you may feel hurt and afraid of the changes that are bound to take place monetarily and emotionally. Unfortunately, not even counseling or time can promise you that all the pain will eventually go away. On the bright side, it is the pain that motivates you to do something to get out of your present predicaments.

The pain will gradually turn into anger. This is where you get angered about what you went through during marriage and possibly how frustrated you were until the end. The majorities of parents will also be angry about the pain the kids will go through because of the separation.

Because of all that is going on, including the pain, denial and anger, you may feel the urge to negotiate with your spouse. This may involve trying to do the impossible to save your sinking marriage. Even though bargaining is known to have saved some marriages, it often does not work, especially when things are already messy. You should hence focus on what your future holds for you.

The guilt phase then kicks in and this where you think about all the things you would have done different. In some cases, the turn of events can be blamed on both spouses. You should therefore take it easy on yourself to get rid of that feeling of carrying around a hundred pounds wrapped around your ankles. Any therapist will tell you for free that you need to get over the guilty feeling for you to move on.

Unfortunately the depression stage is almost inevitable. You are likely to have a void and filling it will not be a simple thing to do. This is more so the case if you were married for years and had a profound love for your spouse. It is during this phase that most people decide to seek counseling.

The final stage involves acceptance. This comes like a breath of fresh air and you finally accept what happened and begin to forge forward. Acceptance often takes place when the body becomes tired of grieving and develops a reliable coping mechanism.




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